A clever way to survive while remaining broke and unemployed.
Man knocks on random door.
W: Can I help you?
M: Yes, and by helping me, you would be helping yourself.
W: What do you want?
M: Well, I’m looking for donations to help my cause, any amount would be great.
W: What exactly is your cause?
M: Well, as you probably are already well aware, the world is about to end.
W: It is? How?
M: Well, through various means and methods which are all equally undesirable and horrible.
M: But, what is important is by simply giving me enough money for food and other necessities, your survival along with the rest of humanity is mutually assured.
W: And why exactly is that?
M: I’m with the government.
W: What do you do for the government?
M: I keep the world from ending.
W: Is there really that big of a threat?
M: Hell yes, as we speak there are forces at work which are out to kill you specifically.
W: I thought the whole world was threatened.
M: Not the people that have given me money. I’m doing this for your benefit, if you want to die, feel free to be a cheap whore.
W: Why should I believe you?
M: Well, for starters, if you don’t, the consequences are much worse than if you do…so do you got five bucks or what?
W: Fine, get the hell out of here.
M: Thank you kindly and the government of Iran appreciates your contributions.